(total) Absolution

My body is shaking with the (lack of) anticipation,

turning me towards something I want(ed) so badly.

How am I capable of being this (over)stimulated

while being completely torn (apart) in two directions?

My (dis)agreeable thoughts lead me to the room,

where one (less) heart will beat tonight.

(Non)Conforming ideals taking me to the peak of pleasure

and (raging) fire running deep within my veins.

If all it took to feel, the (deficient) appetite of this life

was to (un)lock these heavy doors,

One may never come up for air, and with that rightly so.

Without a Trace

The faint whispers of the day

are about to fade

into the depth of night

where souls are lost

and bodies are rekindled.

No one was ever lost

into the darkness

that became tomorrow.

Creationism

The air is heavy with her sorrows,

They have strangled her,

brought her to the depth of the great blue sea.

She can no longer taste her environment,

deprived of oxygen and sinking into a bottomless expanse.

Above her head, the waves do nothing but churn.

Air blends with tribulation and humidity,

the lightened versions turning to rain.

The drops they fall,

dragging the rays of would be sunshine ashore.

It's the atmosphere she's created

without her, They would be nothing more.

Courtney

Dear Sister,

The tears, they

break at my heartstrings.

Our quiet which ensues,

conversationalists know as simply silence.

You may speak but a word

but instead embrace upon what we have known.

This bond of One

true hearted, unrequited love

pulls the symphony whole again.

Your absence means but nothing.

Marry the sorrows and chant,

"I love you, till the end."

Spindle Weed

The beast it lives

inside my leaves.

Blossoming

and mesmerized,

while falsely

intertwined.

Pause to listen,

a sensation, of fearful ecstasy.

Grasp the dreams

to negotiate,

breathe deep and

jump.

Seyart

For awhile now I've had this necklace that was given to me by someone I loved at a very pivotal time in my life. We really meant a lot to each other, falling fast and eventually falling hard. The one thing that always holds a positive memory of our time together is this necklace and it serves as much more than a token of his love.

It was acquired during a trip to Spain and the message reads, be positive. I'll never know the reasoning behind the exact gift, but I believe his intentions to be genuine, pure and something I'll never truly understand. This moment epically foreshadowed the beginning stages of markers being set in place, walking me through my battles safely. Life has a funny way of working out and this is just one of those interesting reminders of how someone can see the through the veil without you being able to see back.

Here is something I wrote to capture the essence of what this pendant stands for:

be positive.

believe.

be the one.